We might think we know everything there is to know about dating when the truth is that we have it easy in our modern world. 30 to 40 years ago, most people didn’t have the internet and meeting new singles was not just a matter of signing up to the next free dating website. Instead people had to talk to each other face to face rather than being able to hide behind their computers during most of the process. Naturally some dating services did exist, but they were far from being the free / user-friendly interfaces we see today. So when it comes to dating advice, there are definitely some things we can learn from the older generations who didn’t have it so easy…
1 – You cannot lie about who you are, it always gets back to you.
Okay so we know lying never leads to much good, but we all tend to at least make ourselves sound nicer than and look better than what we are when we date online. It’s a natural process that occurs as we want others to notice our online profiles, after all we go face a lot of competition out there. But here is what you learn from actually being physically in front of that person: there is only so much you can exaggerate before they catch up. This most definitely is also the case with online dating: the more you lie online, the more the person will find out you are lying when they meet up with you. Then you can kiss their trust goodbye… so stay honest as much as you can, it’s the right thing to do.
2 – Dating isn’t a fashion race.
What this means is that you can’t simply do what other people do just to look cool to the eyes of your peers. This also means that you shouldn’t just do the opposite of what everyone else does out of a sense of anti-conformity. Those are your emotions that are on the line, so the best thing is that you sit down and work out what you actually want from dating. Some people just want a loving family, others just want to have casual encounters and others even think granny dating is fun. The world is diverse and we as individuals embrace different things, so take the time to find out what your ambitions are and what makes you happy.
3 – It’s not about the surface.
The surface is what you see at first, it is people’s clothes, their skin, the colour of their eyes… But love is deeper than that, and the ingredients to a lasting relationship are to be founds under that surface. You personality, you fears and desires; all the things that are truly important to you will also matter for you partner. Looks do have their importance, but you really need to look deeper into people to really understand them. Remember: good looks only last so long, what is important is how well you can treat someone and how much commitment you are willing to put in your relationship. If you’re not the committed person then stick to casual encounters but if you think you got what it takes, then try the big dive into a serious relationship. Casual may sound superficial, but it is better than letting people down further down the line…